The Adam Sandler Song

by Doug Walker

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You used to love me when I did SNL,
Now you want me to sock cocks in Hell
There was a time when I made hit after hit
But now my career is slipping into shit
What the Hell happened to me?
I used to be the clown prince of comedy
I used to say “They’re all gonna laugh at you.”
And now I’m just praying that you’ll laugh at me
You kids don’t understand why your parents liked this,
But back then my films…eh…were still kinda hit and miss.
Happy made you happy but the Waterboy sucked
Zohan was a go man, but hey Little Nicky sucked
Grown Ups made you throw up while Click made you mostly sick
And Jack and Jill’s a cinematic dicing of your dick
IIIIIII did a few serious films,
you didn’t get any of them but you thought I was okay,
Buuuuut I rather stick to crappy plots,
that were popular in 98
Quirky underdog meets a hot attractive babe
But some unfunny bullies try to stop my goofy ways
My quirky sidekick and/or grandma help me on my path,
While using an annoying voice and jokes about my ass
Thiiiis plot has worked so well for me,
most of the times I take a breath,
Buuuut for others in my company,
it’s always been the kiss of death
What the Hell happened to me?
I made you laugh when you were high in 1990
Now you treat me like a jerk,
and I only make movies to get Rob Schneider work.
What the Hell happened to me?
Please tell me I'm not this generation's Pauly
My movies have become a chore,
and even Barrymore cannot save me anymore.
I don’t know why I’ve angered all of you,
Oh please God save me Hotel Transylvania 2
I do the same thing that I’ve been doing for years,
So what has changed now to give me all these tears?

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released August 18, 2015

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